And the lows more frequent

Order of St. Nick has combined dire economic times with Valentine's Day to come up with a New Depression-era love extravaganza.

"One card shows a Dust Bowl farmer and his wife cooking a pot of slop in an open kettle. Its caption reads: "William took Martha out to eat for Valentine's Day." Another shows a bunch of down-and-out guys in fedoras loitering outside of an automat. "Box of chocolates?" exhorts the caption. "She'll be lucky to get a box of rocks from me this year.'

"If Hallmark came out with this, it would be in poor taste," (owner Andrew) Shaffer admits. "But people need to laugh in tough times. As long as it's approached with humor, even the Great Depression works.""

The Iowa City-based card company also has a line of Nietzsche Valentine's Day cards that would suit the sense of humor that a lot of boys I know have about this time of year. My favorite:

Ah, women. They make the highs higher and the lows more frequent.