I like my martinis very dirty, with as many olives as you can fit in the glass

Card purchased for a bachelorette party this weekend in Vegas:

"Honey, I like my martinis the way I like my men ... the stiffer the better."

Also, the best/worst cupcake topper -- ever.

Hallmark, proving a wee bit more progressive than its rivals

The greeting card giant has launched a line of same-sex "union" cards, featuring "two tuxedos, overlapping hearts or intertwined flowers, with best wishes inside." The cards don't make any specific reference to weddings or marriage, which makes them appropriate for commitment ceremonies, as well as the more than 100,000 gay weddings that are expected to fill the aisles in Calif. in the next three years. It also means that Hallmark isn't 100% jumping into the pool. But it's a step, and certainly better than its largest rival -- American Greetings -- whose statement on the issue is just to "its current offerings are general enough to speak to a lot of different relationships."

Pussies.

May I someday be Phyllis Stocking

I am sure she is a lovely person, bakes the world's sweetest cakes, gives great hugs and has a throng of adoring grandchildren, and despite the fact that my own holiday/birthday card list is already long enough, thank you, I think I love Phyllis Stocking.

The Wyoming woman sends 90 to 100 cards a month and spends $1,000 a year (paid out of her Social Security check) on stamps to mail them to folks -- some of which she clearly doesn't know that well, or else this story would have never been written. But who doesn't love a card? Even from a stranger. Who wouldn't love a note from Phyllis?

She works to keep addresses current ("I figure they'll be looking for their card") and her husband reads the obits to help keep the list ... alive, and though she seems fond of media folks -- the 73-year-old says she works hard not to look "like I'm a stalker."

No one wants that.

The proof is ... on my counter

And it's good! Now, on to the hangtags and other marketing materials. Anyone want to buy a card?

How's that for marketing?